Week in Review 9-18-16

Most of the week has been mundane, working, driving, and sleeping.  I did get a couple of visits in to Robin and to Dad.  Dad tripped an electrical breaker in his house and was trying to get around in the dark.  Luckily I stopped by and and was able to help him get the power back on.  Unfortunately he can't remember what he was doing to trip the breaker.  Dealing with his memory problems is very frustrating - for him as well as the rest of the family.  Sometimes his memory is awful and I worry so much about his safety but then other times he seems just fine.  I worry about it constantly, I continually pray that I will know when it is time to remove him from his house.  I hope that time never comes because I think it would be extremely hard on him to live somewhere else where he can't have all of his tools, bikes, and lawn mowers.

I have mentioned my "un-papered adopted" sister, Julie, several times, but I feel that it is time to tell about her and her family and how they became such a part of our lives.  Julie grew up on the corner behind our house and became best friends with Roxane.  When she was 5 her mother was killed in a freak electrical accident in their kitchen.  Before too long Julie's father remarried.  Unfortunately his new wife was not a good match for Julie and her two brothers.  Consequently Julie spent almost all of the time at our house and we loved and welcomed her into our family knowing full well that she actually had a blood family.  I remember once when Julie broke her arm she came to my mom to take her to the doctor because she did not feel comfortable with her stepmom doing it.

Julie and Rox remained good friends all through grade school, junior high, and even in high school when Julie joined Rockettes and made new friends.  Julie continued to spend many, many hours at our parent's house where it just felt as if she were an official part of the family.  Even as adults Julie has remained close to our family and we call her sister.  My dad was the one who started saying that she was his "un-papered adopted daughter".

Julie married Kevin and they had three wonderful children together.  Kevin was an anesthesiologist and worked long and hard hours, but we got together whenever we could.  In fact, my girls had a couple of fantastic slumber parties at their house where Julie kept them entertained with crazy stories of her youth.

Life seemed to be going well with them except that Kevin started having some problems with his memory and it was soon determined that he was going to have to quit working because of safety to his patients.  Doctor after doctor tried to discover what had happened to Kevin's short-term memory but they couldn't find any answers.  He suffered this for about 10 years, always with a smile and a great attitude.  And then, a couple of years ago, Kevin was diagnosed with plasma cell leukemia, an aggressive form of multiple myeloma, a cancer in which there is no cure.  Julie and Kevin took a trip to the Mayo Clinic, and though they found no cure for his cancer, they did discover the source of his memory loss - Transient Epileptic Amnesia - apparently he had been having hundreds of small seizures daily in which his memory was impaired.  Although they were sad about the cancer they were very relieved to find an answer to his memory loss.

This week I called Julie, to see how things were going with Kevin. She told me that Kevin had not reacted well to the last medicine they tried and that they were going later that afternoon to the doctor to decide if there was anything else they should try or if it is time to quit the medications and put Kevin on Hospice care.  What an awful hard decision!  We made arrangements for Kim and I to visit on Saturday.

Saturday morning we drove to Salt Lake for a visit.  We were a little surprised to see several cars parked at the house.  We rang the doorbell and their oldest daughter, Danielle, answered the door.  She said that her dad was "on the way out".  I mistakenly thought that he was on his way out to go to the doctor or hospital.  She corrected me and told me that he was dying at that very moment!  I'm really not sure what the appropriate response to that comment is.  Julie and her other daughter, Aimee, came to the door.  Kim and I gave tons of hugs and shed a few tears with them and then we left so they could get back to Kevin.

My heart is so heavy.  Kevin will be sorely missed.  Julie and her kids are going to have a long grief period to be able to deal with his loss.  I will miss that smile that he always seemed to have on his face!

Kim and I left the house and drove directly to a floral shop to send a planter to the family.  It was so strange to know that our good friend was in the process of leaving this life, but yet we had plans and were just going to go about our lives as normal.

I had a dinner scheduled that night with my work and since we had planned on visiting with Julie and Kevin until time for the dinner we found ourselves with time on our hands and nothing to do, so I decided to call the rest of the day a date!

We had a "gourmet" meal at Apollo Burger and then did a little shopping.

Kim obviously was clowning around as usual, modeling Thanksgiving hats.  He really wanted to buy these dog skeletons for Halloween, but I talked him out of it.  I know - I'm no fun! He was a dear and had no trouble carrying my purse around, although he insisted on posing with the female model.  I did find a couple of cute blouses for work.

We then met all of my co-workers and partners for a fine dinner at the Mandrin.    It was quite yummy and we had a great time.

The pictures aren't very good, but we had a great time!

I hurt so much with watching the people I love struggle through heartaches.  I worry so much about each and everyone of them, and my heart just hurts.  I know that it isn't productive for me to worry about the struggles they are having, and as much as I want to, I can't fix them or their problems (but I do want to).  I just love them and want them not to hurt.  Honestly, I don't know how God can watch as His children struggle, make mistakes, and openly defy Him.  How can He watch as His children suffer through trials not of their own making?  I don't know - what I DO know is that He is available to comfort us, to give us the strength to bear our trials.  He loves us.  That is the only thought that allows me to go on.  I just wish that all of my loved ones had that knowledge, too.

This week I am grateful for:

The knowledge that death is not the end.